Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
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Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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