It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
