We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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