Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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