I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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