I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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