Nicole vs. Life
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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