i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
