You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
