It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
