it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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