I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
