after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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