Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.

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(810): I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans. http://tfl.nu/8mn2

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(214): View more from Texas

I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me

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(214): I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me http://tfl.nu/9k7n

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(256): View more from Alabama

I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up

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(256): I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up http://tfl.nu/q8f6

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(908): View more from New Jersey

fireball beer pong. youre missing out

(732): View more from New Jersey

how is that even possible?

(908): View more from New Jersey

ove gloves.

(732): View more from New Jersey

be there in ten.

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(908): fireball beer pong. youre missing out (732): how is that even possible? (908): ove gloves. (732): be there in ten. http://tfl.nu/dpvx

Replies (30) Good night (8784) Bad night (1011)
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(785): View more from Kansas

Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.

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(785): Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up. http://tfl.nu/s8n4

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(443): View more from Maryland

I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..

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(443): I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night.. http://tfl.nu/hua7

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(915): View more from Texas

I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper

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(915): I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper http://tfl.nu/xgjg

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(417): View more from Missouri

so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?

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(417): so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra? http://tfl.nu/rm09

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro

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(902): Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro http://tfl.nu/z3ei

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..

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(414): She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits.. http://tfl.nu/lntf

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(207): View more from Maine

Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????

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(207): Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport???? http://tfl.nu/yffg

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents

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(814): the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents http://tfl.nu/oebu

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(407): View more from Florida

Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.

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(407): Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition. http://tfl.nu/erlj

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(520): View more from Arizona

Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.

(1-520): View more from Arizona

I can pencil you in at 3:30

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(520): Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk. (1-520): I can pencil you in at 3:30 http://tfl.nu/ztyv

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(440): View more from Ohio

I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...

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(440): I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning... http://tfl.nu/pfq3

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