bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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