dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
