did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Randomize