I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
