the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
