So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
