Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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