just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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