Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
