party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
