Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
