just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
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by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
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I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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