I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
