Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
