i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
