Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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