One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
