Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize