covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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