My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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