I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
