In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
