Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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