god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
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I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
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Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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