uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize