what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize