he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
