just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
