Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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