You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize