I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize