Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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