Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
