u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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