Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
