You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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