i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
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